Performance Anxiety in Young Athletes: How Parents Can Help Kids Thrive Under Pressure

Does your child seem to love sports but struggle with nerves before a big game? Or perhaps you notice them becoming tense or even avoiding practices? Performance anxiety in youth sports is more common than many people realize. In Orlando, with its vibrant youth sports community, many parents wonder how they can best support their young athletes while minimizing pressure. While a little nervous energy can fuel focus, excessive anxiety can lead to negative feelings, avoidance, and even a drop in performance. In this blog, we’ll explore what performance anxiety is, why it’s common among young athletes, and how you can help your child build the resilience they need to manage the pressure and enjoy the game.

What is Performance Anxiety?

Performance anxiety is a specific form of anxiety that arises when someone fears judgment, failure, or disappointing others. It is entirely natural, and even professional athletes experience this anxiety. In Orlando’s competitive youth sports scene, this type of anxiety can be particularly prevalent, given the high levels of community involvement and expectations. For young athletes, anxiety can be triggered by competition, the pressure to perform well, or the high-stakes environment of games.

Symptoms of Performance Anxiety

• Physical Signs: Stomach aches, sweating, shaking.
• Emotional Signs: Irritability, avoidance, withdrawal [1].

A small amount of nervousness can be helpful—it gets adrenaline pumping, heightening focus. But too much anxiety can disrupt concentration, affect muscle coordination, and undermine an athlete’s confidence.

Why Does Performance Anxiety Affect Young Athletes?

The Pressure to Meet Expectations

Young athletes often feel pressure to meet not only their own expectations but also those of their parents, coaches, and teammates. Even if parents don’t explicitly pressure their children, small cues—such as a tense tone of voice or frustrated sigh—can send the message that only winning matters.

Example: Imagine a young runner who’s naturally fast but starts feeling pressure to always win. Instead of enjoying the sport, the focus shifts to avoiding failure. The joy of running becomes clouded by a fear of not meeting others’ expectations—an experience that diminishes motivation and engagement.

Physical Impacts of Anxiety on Performance

Anxiety triggers the body’s “fight-or-flight” response, releasing stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. While this response can be useful in short bursts—such as during key moments in a game—if it lingers, it can lead to tight muscles, shallow breathing, and impaired coordination [2]. In sports like gymnastics or tennis, where precision and timing are crucial, anxiety can make athletes feel like their mind and body are out of sync.

Roger Federer’s Take on Resilience

Roger Federer, a legendary tennis player, once shared that even he only wins around 55% of the points he plays. “That means I lose almost half the time,” he noted, encouraging young athletes and parents to understand that even at the highest level, losing points is part of the game [3]. By reframing expectations—focusing on each play and learning from each experience—young athletes can approach games with less fear of failure and a greater sense of resilience.

The Impact of Parental Expectations on Performance Anxiety

How Parental Behavior Influences Anxiety

High parental expectations, though well-meaning, can sometimes contribute to performance anxiety. Children are often very sensitive to both verbal and non-verbal cues, which can sometimes add pressure. Learning how to convey support effectively can make a significant difference in reducing this anxiety [4].

Why Too Much Focus on Results Can Be Counterproductive

A heavy focus on results—winning trophies, scoring the most points, or constantly improving rankings—can lead to unintended stress. Instead of seeing sports as fun, children may start associating it with performance metrics, leading to burnout or avoidance [5]. Overemphasis on results can also undermine intrinsic motivation, which is the natural enjoyment of the sport for its own sake.

Analogy: Think of intrinsic motivation as the roots of a tree. A child’s love for their sport is the root system that provides stability and growth. If parents focus only on the visible “branches”—like winning—while ignoring the roots, the tree’s foundation becomes weak, and the child’s long-term motivation can suffer.

Practical Strategies for Parents to Support Their Child

1. Adopt a Growth-Oriented Approach
   Encourage your child to view sports as a learning journey. Mistakes are not setbacks but stepping stones for growth. Praise effort and determination rather than outcomes.
   Example: Instead of saying, “I hope you win,” say, “I love how hard you’ve worked to prepare.”
2. Teach Relaxation Techniques
   Deep breathing, visualization, and mindfulness are powerful tools to calm pre-game nerves.
   Example: Practice “box breathing”—inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four, and hold for four [6].
3. Model Positive Body Language
   Children mirror their parents’ attitudes. Demonstrate a calm and supportive demeanor before and after games.
   Example: After a game, regardless of the outcome, say, “I really enjoyed watching you play today.”
4. Establish a Pre-Game Routine
   Create a consistent pre-game ritual to signal readiness.
   Example: Listening to motivational music, deep breathing, or visualization.
5. Encourage Self-Reflection
   Ask open-ended questions to help your child reflect constructively.
   Example: “What do you think went well?” or “What was the most fun part?” [7].

When to Seek Professional Support

If your child consistently avoids practices, experiences physical symptoms of anxiety, or shows signs of depression or low self-esteem, seeking professional help can be beneficial. Specialized youth sports psychologists in Orlando can provide tailored strategies to manage anxiety effectively [8].

Conclusion

Performance anxiety is a common challenge for young athletes, but with mindful support, it can also become an opportunity for growth. Remember Roger Federer’s wisdom—even the greatest champions lose nearly half the points they play. It’s how they move forward after each point that truly matters.

References

1. 1. Harwood, C. G., & Knight, C. J. (2015). Psychology of Sport and Exercise.
   2. Gabbett, T. J. (2016). British Journal of Sports Medicine, 50(5), 273-280.
   3. Federer, R. (2023). Athletes’ Digest, 28(4), 105-112.
   4. Weinberg, R. S., & Gould, D. (2018). Foundations of Sport and Exercise Psychology.
   5. Dweck, C. S. (2006). Mindset: The New Psychology of Success.
   6. Kerr, G., et al. (2019). Sports Psychology Journal, 13(3), 142-154.
   7. Zimmerman, B. J., & Kitsantas, A. (2005). Psychology of Sport and Exercise, 6(1), 73-84.
   8. Gould, D., et al. (2002). Journal of Coaching Development, 1(2), 15-23.